Come Along, Come Along

Works for Me Wednesday
"Come" vs. "Go"

A while ago Michelle had the opportunity to babysit some cute kids. When she got home I asked her how it went and she said, "Fine, except I felt really bad that they were still awake when their parents got home." As we discussed what she could do next time I asked if she said "go to bed" or "come to bed" and if she ever turned the television off. Guess what the answer was?

I felt badly that she hadn't learned something I learned before she was born - that there is a huge difference between telling someone to do something and taking them by the hand and doing it with them. We remembered the hymn we had sung recently - "Come Along, Come Along" -

"Come along, come along" is the call that will win
In leading to virtue and keeping from sin.
Most men can be led, but few can be driv'n
In shunning perdition and striving to heav'n.

This applies to little children, and for little things as well. She noticed that the child she took to get their teeth brushed, got their teeth brushed. The older one that she told to just go do it, never did. We never had a problem with getting children up in the morning, because instead of yelling across the house, I would always go to them and wake them up with a gentle nudge, basically inviting them to join the family for breakfast or family prayer. Yes, that way took a bit more time, but it helped the decibel level greatly throughout the whole day. When I could hear the bickering/squabbling beginning to start in the other room, I learned that it stopped more quickly if I went to the kids and gently distracted or separated them rather than yelling at them to leave each other alone and be nice. This principle works with doing chores - whether it's cleaning rooms, doing dishes or pulling weeds. It works with homework - "Come and do some flash cards with me." or "You do your math while I balance the checkbook." And it definitely works with going to church and serving others and following the Savior, as the hymn suggests.

So, that's what "works for me" and the next time she babysits, Michelle's going to give it a try as well - AFTER she turns off the TV!

Comments

Great point! I find the same thing works with my twins. Less screaming is really nice also.
Amy said…
I think I know the children in question and I know that they can be very challenging to put to bed. That was great advice for babysitting and for Mommies, too! Thanks for all your great insight and let Michelle know that I'm sorry she had to see the "crazy" Sister Anderson that night ;)
Anonymous said…
Very true! We have a 2yo with Down syndrome, and we're beginning to try to teach her to comply with directions. We often have to go get her to make her comply, which is par for the course with any child, but we've been lazy @ starting with her b/c we know how long it takes her to learn a skill or concept. You've given me a shot in the arm!
Meg said…
I love this advice and wisdom! I'm definitely going to watch myself more and see what kind of preschool teacher I have been- and change! Thanks!
Dave and Julie said…
I just love your comments and perspective! This is a good reminder for our household of little ones!
Beckstrand7 said…
You have an amazing way of sharing some of your best advice in a way that makes us feel that we can do better in this way, without making us feel too guilty for past behavior, thank you! I can do better too, and Amy's right, it's such good advice for moms and babysitters alike. I'm sharing this post with my daughter/babysitter too. Thanks!